Gonzo Wondrous Items

Book of Lewd Desires

AURA moderate divination; CL 3rd SLOT —; PRICE 500 gp; WEIGHT 3 lbs.

DESCRIPTION
A book that, when opened to a blank page in the presence of another creature who the owner of the book desires, an illustration of that creature in a suggestive pose is quickly and magically sketched on the page. If multiple creatures are in the room, they are all illustrated in a single image. The book uses only the information in the imagination of the owner of the book and does not reveal any particular information that they don’t imagine. The style of the image is artistic and embellishments may be made, though is typically accurate enough to distinguish the identity of the individual pictured. A standard book has 50 pages. Once an image has been created, it cannot be erased or destroyed without destroying the page itself.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, unnatural lustUM; COST 250 gp

Cans of Talking

AURA moderate evocation; CL 7th SLOT —; PRICE 25,000 gp; WEIGHT -

DESCRIPTION
These silvery cans are always forged in pairs, and an intangible silvery string that is only visible under the gaze of a detect magic, see invisibility, or similarly powerful magic connects them. Each can can send up to 50+2d10 words to the other per day. This function works across any amount of distance, and even across planes.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, sending; COST 15,000 gp

Cave Bag

AURA moderate conjuration; CL 9th SLOT —; PRICE 5,000 gp; WEIGHT

DESCRIPTION
This unremarkable small cloth sack has a fresh and earthy scent about it and is permanently dirty (as if someone dropped it in mud and it has dried). On its inside the bag has a rocky texture and feels like the mouth of a cave. On the walls grow small gems and stones. Each day it grows up to 10 cp worth of precious or semi-precious stones. It can grow up to 2 GP’s worth of gems at a time before it will stop growing.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous item, secret chest; COST 2,500 gp.

Firekeys

AURA moderate evocation; CL 9th; SLOT none; PRICE 60,000 gp; WEIGHT 8 lbs.

DESCRIPTION
The wielder of this +3 flaming burst KeytarGNZ1 may, as move action, have it take the form of pure fire. This deals no damage to the wielder, however all damage the keytar deals is fire damage when used in this manner. Regardless of its form the wielder may, as a standard action attempt a DC 18 Perform (keyboard instruments) check. If successful then he may shoot a gout of fire in a 30 foot line, this line deals 5d6 points of fire damage. A Reflex save (DC 10 + wielders ranks in Perform (keyboard instruments)) halves this damage. For every 4 by which the user exceeds the Perform check he may select one of the following bonuses, he may select these bonuses multiple times, their effects stack:

  • +10 feet to the length of the line.
  • +1d6 fire damage

Each time he uses the firekeys axes ability to shoot gouts of fire the DC of the check to do so increases by 4, these increases to the DC are temporary and reset at the start of the next day.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Magic Arms and Armor, scorching ray; COST 30,000 gp

Fizzeldywhop (Rust Stone)

AURA faint transmutation; CL 5th SLOT neck; PRICE 1,000 gp; WEIGHT 1 lbs.

DESCRIPTION
This small, rusty, fist-sized sphere is actually a small animated object that loves the taste of rust. If you place a fizzeldywhop in a bag where equipment it will clean off all the rust from a single piece of equipment in 1 hour. In addition, this has the additional benefit of treating it as if it had been sharpened with a whetstone (grants the weapon a +1 enhancement bonus on your damage roll the first time you hit with it.). A fizzeldywhop needs no direction, endlessly seeking and eating whatever rust it finds in its immediate area.

If worn around the neck as a necklace or clutched in a hand a fizzeldywhop provides his master with immunity to a rust monster’s rust attack (or other attacks that expressly rust an object).

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Construct, keen edge; COST 500 gp.

Head Pot of Adequate Trash

AURA faint evocation; CL 5th SLOT neck; PRICE 4,000 gp (+1), 16,000 gp (+2), 36,000 gp (+3), 64,000 gp (+4), 100,000 (+5) gp; WEIGHT -

DESCRIPTION
This copper pot, worn on the head, grants an enhancement bonus of +1 to +5 on attack and damage rolls with improvised melee weapons.

Alternatively, this copper head pot can grant improvised melee weapon special abilities. See Table: Melee Weapon Special Abilities in the Pathfinder Core Rulebook for a list of abilities. Special abilities count as additional bonuses for determining the market value of the item, but do not modify attack or damage bonuses. A head pot of adequate trash cannot have a modified bonus (enhancement bonus plus special ability bonus equivalents) higher than +5. A head pot of adequate trash does not need to have a +1 enhancement bonus to grant an improvised melee weapon special ability.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, greater magic weapon, creator’s caster level must be at least three times the amulet’s bonus, plus any requirements of the melee weapon special abilities; COST 2,000 gp (+1), 8,000 gp (+2), 18,000 gp (+3), 32,000 gp (+4), 50,000 gp (+5)

Hero’s Scarf

AURA strong conjuration; CL 8th SLOT neck; PRICE 16,000 gp; WEIGHT

DESCRIPTION
This crimson scarf bellows dramatically in wind of any sort. If the character has levels in a class with a finishing move, or a transformation trinket magic item, then the wearer treats his level as 4 higher than normal for the purpose of his finishing move, tension pool, and strong start class features as well as the effects of his hero powers.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, creator must be a henshin hero or magical girl; COST 8,000 gp

Insanity Drive

AURA moderate conjuration; CL 9th SLOT —; PRICE 25,000 gp; WEIGHT -

DESCRIPTION
This party popper-style device can be activated by a violent tug on the strings. Once activated, explodes in a dazzling display of rainbows and a cacophony of symphonic noise before teleporting the activator and all his willing allies within 30 feet (as if by greater teleport). An insanity drive teleports you exactly where you NEED to go (not where you WANT to go) and thus the destination is up to the GM. It may deliver you to something plot related (such as to the tower of the Evil Emperor that you need to go to) or it may bring them to a place where the activator didn’t know he needed to be (such as in the birthing chambers of his sister who, it turns out, was having a baby at that very moment) along with all of his allies.

Once used it disappears into the far reaches of the universe, appearing and disappearing at different points in space. Wherever it appears there is a brilliant burst of light and sound for a few seconds before it once again jumps to some other part of the universe to, undoubtedly, scare the hell out of someone else.

After using it there is a 20% chance each day that it will return to the one who activated it and settle down until it is next used. It returns in as flamboyant a way as it departs and may startle sleeping party members quite badly.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, teleport; COST 12,500 gp

Motif Bauble

AURA strong transmutation; CL 15th SLOT —; PRICE 20,000 gp; WEIGHT

DESCRIPTION
Typically taking the form of coins, cards, or some other sort of collectible trinket, each motif bauble is attuned to a specific henshin hero motif. If a henshin hero (or other creature with a transformation trinket, such as a magical girl or a character with a transformation trinket item) spends a swift action to attach it to his transformation trinket he loses access to his motifs powers, and instead gains the motif powers and finishing move bonus using his henshin hero level to determine the powers gained. If the user gains bonus spells from his motif then he may cast those, but they expend two spell slots of that level, instead of just one.

As a full round action that provokes an attack of opportunity, the wearer can destroy the motif bauble. If he does then his motif permanently changes to match that of the henshin hero and is treated, in all ways, as his original motif.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous item, limited wish, Creator must be a henshin hero or magical girl; COST 15,000 gp.

Motif Bauble, Greater

AURA strong transmutation; CL 15th SLOT —; PRICE 35,000 gp; WEIGHT

DESCRIPTION
This item functions as a motif bauble, save that the the user may benefit from this item’s motif as well as any motifs he possesses from his class or other Motif Baubles.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous item, limited wish, Creator must be a henshin hero or magical girl; COST 30,000 gp.

Necklace of Best Friends

AURA faint evocation; CL 5th SLOT neck; PRICE 2,000* gp; WEIGHT -

DESCRIPTION
This necklace is bought in pairs*. It is a single medallion that has been split into two equal parts that can be fitted back together. When two creatures wearing these necklaces are more than 30 feet apart they gain a +2 bonus on all damage rolls with attacks that deal love damage. When they are within 30 feet of each other they get a +2 morale bonus on all aid another checks and Heal checks to support each other.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, aid; COST 1,000* gp
* The price listed and creation requirements are for a set.

Necklace of Meltdowns (Cursed Item)

AURA moderate evocation; CL 8th SLOT neck

DESCRIPTION
This item glows green when the user attempts to activate or wear it. It grants the wearer 2 rads per round it is worn.

MAGIC ITEMS: Amulet of natural armor, amulet of mighty fists, or necklace of fireballs (any type).

Null Bindi

AURA faint conjuration; CL 3rd SLOT head; PRICE 1,000 gp; WEIGHT -.

DESCRIPTION
This small portable hole is only able to be worn in the fashion of a bindi on the forehead of a character with Euclidean points. When worn it creates a small coin sized hole that harmlessly allows someone to see through the skull of the wielder, looking as if they have a hole in the skull. When not on the forehead it looks simply like a black piece of stone. While this appears in the same fashion as a portable hole it can only be placed on a creature with a euclidian pool’s forehead (it will not stick to anyone else’s forehead).

Due to it’s complex and unique spacial distortions this can be expanded as a swift action to restore the wearer of this bindi to their maximum Euclidean points. This is a single use item however and once used it collapses upon itself and is consumed.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, create pitAPG; COST 500 gp

Paranoia Lenses

AURA strong divination; CL 12th; SLOT eyes; PRICE 30,000 gp; WEIGHT - lbs.

DESCRIPTION
These black rimmed spectacles fill the wearer with slight unease when donned. The wearer gains the benefits of blindsense 30 feet, but only against creatures who are actively perceiving the wearer. If a creature is observing the wearer from outside this area then the wearer is knows he is being observed, but no more than that.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, scrying COST 15,000 gp

Prismatic Septer

AURA strong evocation; CL 18th; SLOT none; PRICE 179,800 gp; WEIGHT 8 lbs.

DESCRIPTION
All of the colors of the rainbow spiral along the shaft of this rod, atop its head is a large diamond cut into the shape of a heart. This rod always sheds a prismatic aura of light (as per the light spell) and sparkles when swug.

The rod has 10 charges, like a staff, and can be used to cast the following spells:

  • Prismatic Blast AP:M (1 charge)
  • Prismatic Spray (1 charge)
  • Prismatic Wall (2 charges)
  • Prismatic Sphere (2 charges)

In addition to the spells it can cast, this rod can be used to apply the benefits of the prismatic spell metamagic featAP:M without increasing the spell’s level. This consumes 2 chagres from the staff. No more than one metamagic feat can be applied to a spell cast by the wielder in this way. Using the staff for this purpose does not increase the casting time of the spell.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Rod, Craft Staff, prismatic spray, prismatic ray, prismatic wall, prismatic sphere, Prismatic SpellAP:M metamagic feat COST 89,800 gp

Power Bauble

AURA moderate transmutation; CL See text SLOT none; PRICE see text; WEIGHT

DESCRIPTION
Typically taking the form of coins, cards, or some other sort of collectible trinket. Each power bauble is attuned to a particular henshin hero power or magical girl power whose level prerequisite is equal to or less than the item’s caster level. A henshin hero (or other creature with a transformation trinket, such as a magical girl or a character with a transformation trinket item) may use the bauble as a free action to gain the benefit of that hero power for 1 minute, after which the item is destroyed. If a character uses a power bauble with a caster level higher than his henshin hero or the caster level of his transformation trinket, that character takes 2d6 points of damage + 2 points of damage per level of difference between the baubles caster level and his level.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous item, limited wish, creator must be a henshin hero or magical girl; COST ½ price (see text).

Table: Power Bauble
Type Caster Level Price
Type 1 1st 200 gp
Type 2 4th 800 gp
Type 3 8th 1,600 gp
Type 4 12th 2,400 gp

Quick Change Sheath

AURA strong transmutation; CL 12th; SLOT —; PRICE 2,000 gp (+1), 8,000 gp (+2), 18,000 gp (+3), 32,000 gp (+4), 50,000 gp (+5)

DESCRIPTION
This sheath can warp and twist itself to accommodate any sized weapon. It can store an amount of enhancement bonus or magic weapon special abilities as indicated by its price. Whenever the wielder sheathes a +2 or greater magic weapon in the sheath he may, as a free action, elect to exchange any enhancement bonus or magic weapon properties from the weapon to the sheath and vice versa, this change is permanent. This sheath cannot lower a weapon’s enhancement bonus below +1, nor can it bring a weapon above the sum of its enhancement bonus and magic weapon special abilities. A randomly rolled quick change sheath has a 50% chance of having a magic weapon special ability stored in it already, otherwise it has an equal enhancement bonus.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Magic Arms and Armor, magic weapon; COST 1,000 gp (+1), 4,000 gp (+2), 9,000 gp (+3), 16,000 gp (+4), 25,000 gp (+5)

Raycaster

AURA moderate evocation; CL 5th; PRICE 2,000 gp (+1), 8,000 gp (+2), 18,000 gp (+3), 32,000 gp (+4), 50,000 gp (+5) 72,000 gp (+6), 98,000 gp (+7), 128,000 gp (+8), 162,000 gp (+9), 200,000 gp (+10) WEIGHT

DESCRIPTION
This rod counts as a light mace with an enhancement bonus. A character may utilize this weapon as a focus for any spell that deals hit point damage . A spell-effect cast with this as a focus adds the weapon’s enhancement bonus to the spells attack and damage rolls, the spell also gains any weapon special abilities of the raycaster. If an ability on the ray caster explicitly only works on melee or ranged weapons, then that ability only functions for spells that require a melee or ranged attack respectively to hit their target.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Magic Arms and Armor, Craft Rod, greater magic weapon; COST 1,000 gp (+1), 4,000 gp (+2), 9,000 gp (+3), 16,000 gp (+4), 25,000 gp (+5) 36,000 gp (+6), 49,000 gp (+7), 64,000 gp (+8), 81,000 gp (+9), 100,000 gp (+10)

“Talky” Bullet

AURA faint illusion; CL 5th SLOT neck; PRICE 200 gp; WEIGHT -

DESCRIPTION
If this +1 firearm bullet successfully lodges itself in the target it begins to talked excitedly and unendingly in a telepathic fashion from within the target. An afflicted creature can’t think straight with all that jibber-jabber going on inside its head. It must make a concentration check (DC 10 + spell level) to cast spells while a talky bullet is inside them. The constant, annoying, and absurd ranting last for 1 + 1d4 rounds. The player of the character who fired the bullet (or the GM) is encouraged to endlessly yammer on about random facts and “interesting observations” while it is the struck creature’s turn.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, magic mouth; COST 100 gp

Thunder and Fury

AURA moderate evocation; CL 9th; SLOT none; PRICE 60,000gp; WEIGHT 8 lbs.

DESCRIPTION
The wielder of this +2 shocking burst Mic and CordGNZ1, may, as a standard action let loose a shout boosted by invisible amps. If he succeeds at a DC 18 perform (Perform (sing)) check, all creatures within 10 feet must make a Fortitude save (DC 10+ ranks in Perform (sing)) or take 3d6 points of sonic damage and become staggered for one round.

For every 4 by which the user exceeds this check he may select one of the following bonuses, he may select these bonuses multiple times, their effects stack:

  • +5 feet to the radius of the effect.
  • +1d6 sonic damage.

Each time he uses thunder and fury’s ability to shout the DC of the check to do so increases by 4, these increases to the DC are temporary and reset at the start of the next day.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Magic Arms and Armor, shout, lightning bolt ; COST 30,000 gp

Thunderbolt Axe

AURA moderate evocation; CL 9th; SLOT —; PRICE 60,000 gp; WEIGHT 8 lbs.

DESCRIPTION
The wielder of this +3 shocking burst Guitar GNZ1 may, as move action have it take the form of pure lightning. This deals no damage to the wielder, however all damage the axe deals is electricity damage when used in this manner. Regardless of its form the wielder may, as a standard action attempt a DC 18 Perform (strings) check. If successful then he may call down a bolt of lightning to strike any one target that he can see within 400 feet, this bolt deals 5d6 points of electricity damage. A Reflex save (DC 10 + wielders ranks in Perform (strings)) halves this damage. For every 4 by which the user exceeds the Perform check he may select one of the following bonuses:

  • One additional lighting bolt that strikes another target within range.
  • +1d6 damage to all lighting bolts that the wielder summons.

Each time he uses the thunderbolt axes ability to summon lighting the DC of the check to do so increases by 4, these increases to the DC are temporary and reset at the start of the next day

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Magic Arms and Armor, call lightning storm ; COST 30,000 gp

Thunderdrum

AURA moderate evocation; CL 9th; SLOT —; PRICE 60,000 gp; WEIGHT 8 lbs.
The wielder of this drum can conjure a pair of +1 thundering drumsticksGNZ1 these drumsticks deal sonic damage and can be enchanted to further upgrade their capabilities, using the same Cost as a normal pair of magic weapons. The wielder may, as a standard action, attempt a DC 18 Perform (percussion instruments) check to create a cacophony of crashing, thunderous noises. If successful then he may deal 5d6 points of sonic damage to all creatures within 10 feet of him, excluding himself. A Reflex save (DC 10 + wielders ranks in Perform (percussion instruments)) halves this damage. For every 4 by which the user exceeds this check he may select one of the following bonuses, he may select these bonuses multiple times, their effects stack:

  • +5 feet to the radius of the effect.
  • +1d6 sonic damage.

Each time he uses the thunderdrums ability to create a cacophony the DC of the check to do so increases by 4, these increases to the DC are temporary and reset at the start of the next day

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Magic Arms and Armor, blindness-deafness; COST 30,000 gp

Transformation Trinket

AURA moderate conjuration; CL See text SLOT —; PRICE see text; WEIGHT

DESCRIPTION
Regardless of its form this trinket allows the wielder to transform into a new more powerful form, as a henshin hero or a magical girl (selected at the time of the items creation) of the items caster level. While in this form the wielder accrues tension and may perform a finishing move, spending tension to modify it as normal. This finishing move functions as a henshin hero’s finishing move and deals the listed amount of damage, alternatively if the item allows the user to transform as a magical girl the item’s finishing move acts deals twice the listed number of die of damage and the user spends tension as a magical girl. Unlike the henshin hero’s or magical girls transformation class feature the armor bonus provided by this class feature is fixed and does not gain enhancement bonuses unless the item is enchanted to do so. A transformation trinket has no motif associated with it by default, however the wielder may use a motif bauble to give it one.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous item, transformation trinket class feature, creator must be a henshin hero or a magical girl; COST ½ price (see text).

Table: Transformation Trinket
Type Caster Level Armor Bonus Rounds Per Day Finishing Move Price
Type 1 5th 4 10 3d6 3,000 gp
Type 2 10th 6 20 5d6 8,000 gp
Type 3 15th 8 30 8d6 30,000 gp

Trash Bag

AURA moderate conjuration; CL 3rd SLOT —; PRICE 500 gp; WEIGHT 5 lbs. (full)

DESCRIPTION
This filthy looking, loose woven, sack is always full. It has the faintly unpleasant odor of moldy bread or spilt beer. It holds 5 lbs. of trash (broken chair legs, parts of a ship’s wheel, broken bottles, etc) suitable for use as an improvised weapon. When drawn the wielder must grasp for either a one-handed or two-handed weapon from the back. They will always safely draw such an object, though they have no control over what sort of object they will draw. If the object is a one-handed weapon it weighs 1 lb and if it is a two-handed weapon it weighs 3 lbs. Reduce the weight in the bag by that much. If there is not enough weight left in the bag a weapon cannot be drawn. Every 6 hours this bag fills up with 2 lbs. more worth of mundane trash. This trash has no value and is otherwise unremarkable.

CONSTRUCTION REQUIREMENTS
Craft Wondrous Item, mending; COST 250 gp.

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